Where have all the cribs gone

Since we've gotten rid of the crib its like a free for all in my house. You think its quiet. You think you can finally sit down have a little drink, watch TV when you hear it. At first you think its the neighbors. Maybe a little mouse. But no its worse its the distinctive sound of little feet. It's (gasp) my kids!!! Its like now that the crib is gone the cage has been opened and the animals at the zoo are running free.

My son is stealthy little a little ninja. One time I went into the bathroom and closed the door before seeing him flush against the wall. Silently watching me. Sometimes at night I have the horrible feeling like something is watching me. I look up and there he is. Black rimmed eyes like the boy in the grudge staring at me. Waiting to ask me if Michael Jackson had ever gone to the moon to learn to moon walk or why fish never blink when they clearly have water in their eyes. Its eerie and frightening.

My daughter is less stealthy. She's like the Godfather in pigtails demanding goldfish and strawberry milk. She wanders the halls bumping into things and humming the Wonder pets theme song.

Its getting so I can never trust a moments peace I know that at any minute my children may enter. I may never be able to watch a show that is not rated G again -just-in-case. Why cant they make a crib with the bars on the top so her mommy can have a little drink in peace. Is that so wrong...