Friday, February 6, 2009

Tales Of The Toilet Seat

Yesterday I went to the gym. Before I went out on the floor I thought I would stop and have a potty break. (Yes it is that kind of a post) I opened one of the stalls and was greeted with a toilet seat covered in pee. Yuck, I thought how gross. I shut the door. I opened the next stall and was assaulted by yet another pee pee covered seat. I went to the next and the next all the toilets were covered with the stuff.

I wonder how something like that happens. How do women who are designed to sit upon a seat manage to pee all over them? I doubt a man snuck into the women's locker room just to pee all over the seats. My four year old could be responsible as he has some terrible aim but as far as I know he doesn't go to my gym (unless he is doing so behind my back) so that rules him out.

Perhaps a women is trying to perfect peeing her name in the snow and is trying out her technique in the women's locker room on all of the toilets.

Maybe a giant pee monster escaped from the monster jail and is getting revenge and mistook the women's locker room for his captors home.

Whatever it is that peed all over the toilet seats in the locker room I must say I am impressed. If it had just hit one toilet I would have shrugged it off. But to hit all six shows it has some stamina and a very large bladder.

Good for you super bladder creature! Good for you!

30 comments:

Rebecca Ramsey said...

What is it with all the pee? I've asked the same thing myself! Aren't we all pretty much the same anatomically? It doesn't seem possible to me, unless you're dancing over the toilet seat while you pee. Do people do that?

Queen of Pith said...

It could be from massive flushing - you know - pee splashes out.

Another reason to avoid the gym.

Unknown said...

When all the seats are covered like that it is usually because of the water pressure from the flush spraying the pee/toilet water mixture all over the seats. Still totally gross, but I don't think someone is going and peeing on the seats...it's the toilet flush...ewwwwwwww!!!

I thought for years that there were disgusting women in droves going around public restrooms peeing on the seats, until someone explained the whole water pressure thing to me....just once more public place to avoid!

Suzie said...

But the water was pee pee yellow!

Although I like your water pressure theory this was pee!

Scott said...

By link exchange I mean you put a link to my blog in your links, and i do the same for you on my page! I think since we both enjoy each others blogs its a great idea!

Valarie Lea said...

I think it's that they are using the squat method and are not doing a very good job at it.

Queen-Size funny bone said...

Nobody sits anymore and so it now becomes a squat. most people are not physically able to squat for very long and there goes the pee on the seat and they are too lazy to clean it up.

Unknown said...

Whats grosser than gross?

Pee on a public seat :{

Maria said...

I don't like it when they can't hit the mark, I mean come on!! secondly, I work in an office where I am the youngest at 32, how can we not know how to flush, and why do they stuff the commode full of paper?

Btw Suzie, Ale-8 is a soda that is made only in KY. It use to be sold only within 60miles of the plant, until Coke bought them about maybe 2yrs ago. They are GREAT, kinda like a ginger ale, but with the caffiene equal to 2+ mt dews.

Anonymous said...

I think it's because women hover over the seat, to avoid having to actually sit on it. You know, because of germs and all.

I do this myself, but I put down one of those flushable seat cover thingies first.

Debbie said...

Sometimes it is the flush spraying up on the seat. But far too many women "hover" and pee everywhere.

Adrienne said...

Some people need to learn the "If You Sprinkle..." poem

Unknown said...

Flo knows...

http://askflo.blogspot.com

Susan said...

Personally, I think it is from the "hover crafts".

autumnesf said...

I think I'm gonna pee my seat just from reading this!!

Vered said...

Yup, hovering. But they should wipe the seat after they're done.

Kate Coveny Hood said...

It's because people are obsessed with germs and refuse to actually sit down. So instead they squat over the seat and get pee all over it. And of course they don't consider the option of cleaning up after themselves because - you know, that would be gross.

Kate Coveny Hood said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Ummm, yuck. I think they kind of hover over the seat because they're paranoid about sitting down in a public loo. You'd think they'd clean it up. Just yuck.

Tales From the Eurovan said...

I'm with you on this one! I wonder if someone's mother instilled into them such a fear of toilet seats that they hover above the seat while peeing and move while they are going. That's all I've got on this one. If you figure it out, let us know!
Take care,
Julie

Brooke said...

I have been grossed out by the pee on the seat! It seems to be everywhere in public restrooms. I promise I NEVER pee on the seat!

Helen said...

Don'tcha just hate it when that happens? And belive it or not - it happens to so many so frequently, one would think there is some kind of pee conspiracy!!!!

Anonymous said...

This drives me insane when women do this. Seriously, how rude and gross are these people??

Anonymous said...

It's the pee fairy.Cousin of the tooth fairy.Not as popular, in fact, despised.

April said...

people need to just sit on the damn seat already.

Anonymous said...

You've just identified one of my pet peeves. I actually think women should be arrested for this. They don't want to get dirty from the toilet seat so they hover over it like an eagle guarding its nest and miss the target. Then, although they didn't want to get dirty themselves, they have no problem leaving their mess for the next person. I HATE THEM and think they should be punished harshly.

Not Your Aunt B said...

At the gym, you would *think* girls would know how to hover- work those quads! The pee girl needs to do more squats.

What's grosser is finding a pube on the toilet seat. Ick, ick, ick, gag.

R Allen said...

I say put a gps on your 4 year old. Then follow him around... you never know.

Simply_Pam said...

Post a sign.. "If you sprinkle when you tinkle.. be a sweetie and wipe the seatie ! Might help !

Anonymous said...

One day these ladies who are so ladylike they would never want to touch a toilet seat, and who therefore squat and pee all over the seat- leaving it for the next lady, will grow old. Before they get too ancient they will still be at the health club, in a restaurant, at an airport or a theater, but they will have no choice due to lack of strength but to sit right down on that seat!!! They may also by that age have poorer eyesight than when younger. Horror of horrors these ladies will finally sit right down time and again on someone else's pee. Finally they will see what has been driving all us other ladies mad about their selfish habits of leaving their pee on the seat.
Just think about your own mother or grandmother having to experience this now. Clean it up ladies and wash your hands with soap. Then, do the right thing and call people out on it. Let them know what they are doing, why it annoys you, and what they should be doing.

 
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