Facebook is One Scary Place!

I'm into trying new computery things. I twitter, I blog, I've my spaced, I've even downloaded a few itunes and I don't even have an ipod. So knowing how savey I am my "friend" (I now say that in quotes) convinced me Facebook was the place to be. It was like the studio 54 of the 21st Century. The hip in place to be. So as not to loose any more street cred (I wear more mom jeans, go to bed by 9pm, and make meatloaf on a regular basis. My hip points are sorely lacking) I decided to go and see what all the fuss was about.

This is what I found in the first 10 minutes:

1 high school prom (ummm lets call him a date)

4 old boyfriends

3 mean chicks who hated me in high school

1 guy who still remembered that unpleasant comment I made in 1986 and was still holding a grudge

and some guy named Ed who for the life of me I cant remember

I grew up in Philly and although it was a big city it felt like a small town. Everyone knew everybody. Every silly thing you did was broadcast to all citizens of my town (at least it felt that way). As a teenager I did a lot of silly things. I think in fact I was the queen of silly things. When I left Philly I breathed a big sigh of relief and I thought now I can start fresh.

And I did

Until Facebook.

Did you ever have that nightmare where everyone you knew in high school were still there dishing the dirt on you. Pointing and poking you all over again. Where you never really grew up and felt just as vunerable as you did all those years ago? Did you?

Well welcome to Facebook!

Flash Back Friday- And More Bug Stuff

I deeply apologies for grossing everyone out. I am ashamed that I brought you with me on my trip through bed bug land. I took B to the doc where he got FOUR SHOTS!!! and they said it was probably mosquito's. Deep sigh of relief. But since I did take you there I thought I would share with you a little story that happened to me years ago. Since it is Flash Back Friday I thought I would give it a go. (Warning this story is not for the squeamish)

It was my first year of teaching. I was teaching a class of three year old. That year I had some trouble sleeping so I used to wear an eye mask to help block out the light and let me sleep better. I developed a sty in my eye. It was itchy and red and I thought it was from the mask. I called my Dad and he told me to get a sty kit from the drug store. I followed the directions. I held a hot compress to my eye for 10 min and applied the cleanser suddenly all this white stuff came streaming out of my eye but instead of traveling down my face it ran up into my hair. It was LICE!!!!! I ripped off my clothes and ran in circles screaming trying to get away from my self (that does not work). Apparently the lice had buried themselves into my eye lashes and had laid eggs there. The hot compress had hatched them and the cleanser had sent them running. My boyfriend at the time (yes I was a bad girl and was living in sin) calmly sat me down and picked all the remaining lice out of my eye lashed with a tweezers. After that we got briefly engaged go figure. I still have a scar on my eye lid and I think since that day I've been a little sensitive about bugs on my body. Go figure.

Anyway I apologies for that story too but I just had to share.

To All the Jobs I've Had Before

Since Labor Day is coming up I thought I would do a tribute to some the wonderful jobs I have been fired from though out the years. Please take my hand and join me for this wonderful trip down memory lane where you're fired is more than a catch phrase.

I was an ironing girl where I worked in a dank windowless basement with a hot press. I was surrounded by women who looked like life had just sucked the souls out of them all. Oddly enough I loved this job. I loved seeing the wrinkly clothes get nice and smooth. I loved it so much I sang. Yes I sung show tunes at the top of my lunges and apparently unless you are singing one of those galley songs from Ben Hur the soulless troupes who inhabited that basement just didn't like it. They glared at me with their beady red eyes wincing at the light I brought to the basement with my cheerful tunes. I mean who doesn't like to hear Oh What A Beautiful Morning at 7am? .....they didn't so I was fired.

I was fired from being a go-go girl. Yes, I danced in a night club. (Slutty huh?) We were told to dress in skimpy clothing so I showed up in a full dress that went down to my ankles and up to my neck. I danced like a goth (I was pretty darn gothy at the time) waving my arms wildly and putting my hand to my forehead in mock gothy grief. I thought I was being sexy but apparently I was being just sort of strange so ...yup I was fired.

I was also a coat check girl. I worked at a fancy theater. One night in the middle of the allergy season I got a terrible nose bleed. It was the end of the night and hundreds of patrons came rushing out to get their coats. As I handed an old lady her fur coat the tissue I had shoved up my nose to stop the bleeding came loose. They thought I was making a statement for Peta I was actually making a statement for Clariten. So by by coat check girl.

Thank you for joining me on this trip down the lane of jobs I have lost. You may ask, "Suzie are you ashamed? Being fired is pretty awful." No I say No! I will continue to hold my head high and say yes I have been fired not once not twice but a whole bunch of times and yes they were pretty awful job to begin with. But so what? What makes you so great? Who do you think you are anyway? Sigh....