Wednesday, October 29, 2008

A Halloween Tale

Maybe it because Halloween is around the bend or maybe its because Little S is teething all night long but some scary thought have been drifting in my mind lately. Scary thoughts that make you shiver and pull the covers up just a little higher.

Turn down the lights grab your teddy bears and pass the candy corn its time for a Halloween numbers tale.

At 30 I was married.
Spooky right but it took me five years to drag him kicking and screaming down the aisle

At 35 little B was born
Creepy and scary but it took a little convincing too

At 38 Little S was born
Eerily enough that took some convincing on my part

I will be 40 when Little B goes to kindergarten and 43 when Little S goes to kindergarten
Hold onto your hats it gets even creepier still

I will be 47 at B's Bar Mitzvah and 50 at S's
Get the flashlight!

I'll be 52 when B finishes high school 55 when S graduates
Hold me!

56 for college
I cant look!

between 60-70 when they get married and have kids
I wanna go home!

Ill be dead before my Grand kids have a Bar or Bat mitzvah
Oh MY GOSH!!!!!!That's it turn on the lights! Give me that teddy bear and a case of candy corn and a large martini!


I'm so old!!!!!

I hate Halloween!

38 comments:

Kristin H. said...

Stop. It. Now.

The end.

Ali said...

Ha. That was frightening, I grant you. Try this though. I had two kids and then a large gap (perfectly timed) before my younger two. This was done oh so cleverly to ensure that.....
as of January, I will have at least one teenager in the house until 2028. Constantly. (assuming none of them leave home early, which, trust me, my luck, not likely)

The Mrs. said...

Hmmm let me try...

I'll be 30 when dash-1 goes to kindergarten and depending where we are 32 or 33 for -2.

When they graduate from HS and head off to college I'll be 42 and 45 respectively. I LOVE IT! I might not have had much life before kids... but there is my dear LIFE AFTER KIDS!!
no matter how old you might be!

Maggie said...

Ah, you're not THAT old! =)

You could have been like me... I had my first son at 20, and then my second at 33. It will be like raising another one all over again after the first one leaves the nest!!

Tina said...

lol. i work things out how old i will be in future for things and it is scary!

thanks for stopping by

Tina said...

ignore the thanks for stopping by you must think im a weirdo!

i have been saying the same to everyone who came by my wordless, but your my friend haha!!

TattingChic said...

LOL!
What a funny post. It's okay, you'll be okay!

To answer your question on my blog post today: you can send anything you want in the mail, right? ISn't that true? I thought so. ;)

Rebecca Ramsey said...

Get a hold of yourself woman! :)
I guarantee that when you're in a crowd of their classmates' mommies, you won't be the only "mature mommy." And if you are, it makes things kind of funny. (At least that's the attitude I'm trying to take with my youngest. He told me the other day, "Mom, the other moms don't know nearly as much about history as you do. But I just tell them you lived it!"
Becky

PS. To answer your question on my blog, why yes! We lived in France four years. That's how I wrote the book. Hey, if you lived by my neighbor there, you'd want to write a book too!

Scintilla said...

I love your blog and I'll be back.

Your post was too funny. Life is kinda scary (speaks mother of four)!

Erin said...

How funny (not ha ha funny, but what's going on funny) that thinking about Halloween led you to your death.

Maybe we should skip Halloween next year??? I sure wouldn't mind!

April said...

I'd skip Halloween, too, if it weren't for it being Sylvia's bday!

WillThink4Wine said...

Age is just a number! That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

Chimera said...

Brilliant! I can't go there! Truly, very scary.
(and very clever bit of wit dear cuz)
T xx

Cat said...

Don't worry about it TOO much - there's always the chance that your children will do the whole "teenage pregnancy" thing!

Debbie said...

I'm on the same time line as you. No fair with the scary tales!

Michele said...

Hey now, we are sort of in the same boat. My first was born when I was 38 and if we have a 2nd, I will be 39 when I conceive and 40 when she/he is born! Paul is 5 years older than me so you can imagine how he feels. Age is only a state of mind, right?

Lance said...

I don't know - I think it's scary having kids at a young age - I was in my mid-twenties - a new father -- that was really scary...but hey, I've survived so far -- and so will you Suzie!

Vered - MomGrind said...

Well, what can you do, right? It is what it is.

Enjoy the moment, my dear. :)

Kmommy said...

LOL! I had my first baby (D) at 35, then had my second one at 37! Hubby was 40 & 42. Yep, we're right there with you: Old people! ;)

adrienne said...

Not fair. I had my kids at those exact ages. And my kids are older than yours. Now I need a martini.

Kate @ Life As I Live It said...

As is my dad's and my motto: "Growing older isn't an option. Growing UP is."

Kate Coveny Hood said...

Just one of the many reasons that I hate Halloween (50% of the time) - it scares Suzie!

Jannie Funster said...

Yay, another blatant comments lover! Thank God your post was interesting.

Age - all so relative, don't sweat it ever. Just have fun.

M said...

What a journey! Thanks for sharing!

honeywine said...

I'll trade you.

Vodka Mom said...

okay, so I will be 57 when the GOlden Boy graduates from high school. (Can we wine together? I'll bring the cheese.)

April said...

well aren't we morbid tonight? i, personally, plan on living forever. and, so far, it's working out fine ;-)

Cristina Mathers said...

noooo! now you are making me do math and it's freaking me out!

Prefers Her Fantasy Life said...

For your sake, you'd better hope your kids have unprotected sex in their teens so you can make the Bar/Bat Mitzvahs of your grandchildren!!!

Erin, Nick and Merrick said...

I second the whole "living forever" theory! Sign me up!

Madge said...

oooohh i do not like that kind of math at all!

forgetfulone said...

Are you teaching pessimistic math at that school of yours? I'm already old! I'll be 48 when mine graduate high school. I'm 43 now.

Veronica said...

Just catching up, pleased to hear that the bobo emerged (mostly) unscathed!

And you don't want me to do the 'I will be xx when Amy is xx'. You truly don't.

tiff said...

I knew there was a reason why we don't celebrate halloween here.

Tales From the Eurovan said...

Numbers can be so depressing can't they? I'm going to make the most of my days!

so glad your son managed to poop out the pacifier okay. What a scare!

Take care,
Julie

Heather said...

Yikes. Now I'm freaked out! I never thought about this before, but I will be, er...47 when Bee graduates from high school. I remember when I was a kid, I thought 47 was ancient!

BTW..thanks for the tip about the Picasa slideshow. I made one and it works!

Valarie said...

Oh your not old!!! Remember 50 is the new 40 so everything will be fine. :)

Lori B in VT said...

Hey Suzie,
Saw your parents last month and look how well we've all turned out even though our parents are old. (Although I find it very hard to believe, Michelle and I must've been tougher on my mom and dad than you were on yours as ours have both gone completely silver on top :)
Just look how charming and mellow and well-mannered they turned out to be! But for comparison, my mom was 36 when she had me and she's still spry enough to patiently wait for my grandkids to get born. What it really means is you'll be RETIRED when grandkids come along and thus a source of free babysitting. Be well,

 
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