Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Did I Ever Tell You...

My sister in law is getting married. She's great so I offered to send out the invites to her shower. As I am pretty busy I came up with the ingenious idea to do it first thing in the morning at work before my boss gets in.

I wanted to make the cards look wonderful so I bought these fancy laser labels. I tried them in the ink jet printer and they smeared. Now everyone knows You can't have a smeared label its just not done. So I had a brilliant idea to stick them in the copy machine.

Please note it was 7:30am I had just stood in line to vote for and hour and a half. I was woozy and I hadn't had any coffee yet.

So I loaded them in and waited expectantly for my beautiful labels to emerge. The first page went through no problem. I held the matt clear labels in my hand and patted myself on the back for being able to do it all.

I waited patiently for the second page to emerge.

Suddenly the machine coughed and spluttered and started to smoke. Instead of my beautiful labels one column of chard stickers where thrown violently from the machine. I opened the machine sure I could pull it out but it tore and smoldered. Little labels with fancy apple chancery font stuck on the turning wheel thing. Aunt Jesspos label stuck to the whosie whatsit.

I tried everything. I pulled I pushed. I used tweezers. I cried but the machine would not listen it just whirled and steamed as if to say you are going to be in so much TROUBLE!!!!

My boss is a nice guy but breaking his machine and doing shower invites at the job? To put it mildly he would not be happy and I knew I was doomed!

I began to panic. I tried to run through other pages with educational material on it so it wouldn't look like it was my fancy labels that had broken the $2000 copy machine. It was no use. I was sunk.

I sat against the machine and whimpered getting ready to spill the beans and tell my boss everything. Suddenly from the kitchen my knight in shining armor entered; the cook.

Step back she said. With nimble fingers coated in breadcrumbs from the chicken fingers she prodded and tinkered and finally pulled the blackened remains of my labels from the machine.

Here she said and threw them on my desk.

I gasped in awe and uttered a "Thank you!" She turned grabbed her pot holders and said "No Problem".

Who says there are no heros anymore?

29 comments:

April said...

i just broke out in a cold sweat reading your story... jamming the copier (with personal effects) is the WORST.

*sigh* so glad it came to a good resolution.

Paige said...

oh man who has that NOT happened to? with me, it as some magnets on special magnet stuff designed for the damn copier.

Oh the memories--

Mama Smurf said...

Whew! Close one!

Chimera said...

Very appallingly funny. Photocopier machines are the devils creation. Don't get me started on cell phones.
invites eh? You realise this is only the beginning...
T xx
Go Obamamamamamama!

Kate Coveny Hood said...

That sounds like something that would happen to me. I'm so glad the day was saved.

Maggie said...

LOL "whosie whatsit" So funny!!

Glad she as able to fix it!! Or someone may have been in TROU-BLE!! =S

Rebecca Ramsey said...

Yey Cook!
I hope you got your cookie for voting!

debbyweighsin said...

Well, I haven't done the copy machine thing, but not being computer savvy, I have tried to copy something for myself off the computer at work, and hit the print icon a few times too many, and 400 copied pages later...amidst much running back and forth between computer and copy machine and breaking out in a cold sweat vs. hot flashes...

Anyways, Suzie, I came over here from Miz's blog to give you a compliment. I can't imagine that you need anyone else to tell you how hilarious you are. I have spent way too much time going back and reading through your archives, And really laughing out loud, for real. And really, its kinda frustrating, because this morning I have been thinking about how I have to get this blogging thing under control, and now I have yet ANOTHER blog I cannot go without reading in the morning!

So really, that was a compliment. Ignore the complaint at the end--hehe!

Cat said...

Oh my dear god, I was panicking on your behalf. I've melted labels before. It's traumatizing. You need to seek mental help in order to process this episode and move on with your life! If I can get through it, I know you can too. You're a strong woman. Will be thinking of you during this difficult time.

Aunt LoLo said...

How on earth do photocopiers know just the right time to break down?! I swear, they're possessed.

Thank goodness for Cooks!

Thanks for stopping by Bubba Bubbles...and DEFINITELY go get yourself some Super Glue. If all the copiers in the world suddenly get glued shut with fancy contraband...at least we'll still know where our hubs' wedding rings are!

MizFit said...

SHEROES?

:)

Not Your Aunt Bea said...

Talk about a close call. I hate that sinking feeling you get in your stomach when you know you're going to get busted. Thank goodness for the cook! Hooray!

Brooke said...

Hooray for the cook!

Annie said...

Hooray for the cook!!! I might have hugged her.

gizmogirl said...

Yay for cook! You're a very funny writer - I enjoyed the posts I read today.

Valarie said...

Pheww saved by the cook!

We are THAT Family said...

I need her. My scanner isn't working!

Queen-Size funny bone said...

If you can't fix the copy machine than get out of the kitchen...lol

Misty said...

Hooray! Hooray! She saved the day! What a wonderful ending to a stomach turning tale!

RooBabs said...

Hi Suzie,

I just wanted to drop by and give a compliment as well (from MizFit). I'm a first time visitor, and right off the bat, I noticed that you have a great blog theme/pattern/layout. Then I started reading, and you have a gift for storytelling. I was so scared for you about the copy machine. And you have a knack for humor, too. I love your comment poem. = )

adrienne said...

Ooh, buy that cook something nice.

Veronica said...

Dude, never ever underestimate the cook.

Debbie said...

Don't you just love it when you get rescued from what looks like a terrible situation? Yeah for you.

tiff said...

Yay Cook! I bet she is one cool woman.

Jannie said...

Yay for the cook!!

forgetfulone said...

You gotta appreciate the cafeteria staff! Some of the most taken-for-granted personnel in schools.

afiori said...

Brilliant writing.
And OF COURSE that happens when you're doing something you're not supposed to, probably a one-time thing as well...

♥ visit me at www.afiori.com

Ren said...

Oh goodness, I'm so glad that the cook came to the rescue! WOOHOO!

Kmommy said...

How awesome is that?? :)

 
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